Tuesday, May 28, 2013

"30 Day Challenge. Here we go." Day 1

I found this little thing on Pinterest when I was researching how to become a better blogger. I have decided that I am only going to blog once a day instead of 2. Because, let's face it, 2 times a day is sometimes really hard to think of something to say. Anywho, I am going go for The Freckled Italian's 30 Day Challenge! Hopefully this will give me more ideas as my blogging goes on ;o)

Day 1 - Tells me to discuss my current relationship...
Oh what can I say about my current status in this crazy mixed up life that we call marriage?!?!? I have been with my husband for 5 years, 6 months, and 1 day and we have been married for 2 years, 8 months, 1 week and 5 days of those five and a half years. We have had A LOT of downs and we have had A LOT of ups. In the 2 years we have been married we had a beautiful baby boy who is 1 year, 8 months old and we are currently 30 weeks and 4 days pregnant with a baby girl...who will be our last child.

Now to tell you how crazy this relationship started...
The year is 2007. The month is November. I had just recently gotten out of a relationship with a man, whom I found out was bi-sexual and was more interested in his last boyfriend than he was with me...So now I am living with my mom, working a full-time job, disabled from the Army (yes, I'm a disabled veteran), AND taking care of the 2 daughters that I had just gotten custody of back from my parents (as they were temporary guardians while I straightened out my life...which is a WHOLE other story) in June.

I was feeling like I needed something solid in my life and was feeling very lonely. I mean, come on, I went from being in a room where 244 other women lived (barracks can be very crowded) to living in a dorm room with 2 other women (med-hold was so mice and quiet but at least I still had company) to being at home with my mom...ALL OVER AGAIN at 26 years old...I just wanted my life back. So I thought to myself, "My older sister met her 2nd husband online, my mom met her current boyfriend online, I hear about people meeting online on TV and the radio all the time, I'm single, I'm lonely, and I want my girls to grow up knowing they will have a male figure in their life (other than just my dad)...what harm can it do?"

So I signed up for some random free site (sorry I don't remember the name of it) and found a gentleman who really sparked my interest. We talked for about 10 minutes and he told me to check out his profile on a different site because it was more complete. "Great", I thought, "more work for me to fill out a sign up form". But I did it. I put in the specs I was looking for in a mate and within 15 minutes I had HUNDREDS of men that would "match" me. Mind you, the guy that I originally talked to was not one of them so I just decided that it wasn't meant to be and moved on...

Then I found the profile of this guy...he was good looking, had A LOT of the same interests that I did, AND he had kids of his own! I thought maybe he wouldn't want a woman with children since he already had his own but I took a leap of faith and contacted him. Now, on this website, if you pay for it, you can say or type whatever you wish...BUT since I was tight on cash (just being out of the military and taking care of 2 kids of my own) I decided to go the free route and could only give automated responses to anything he asked me. He asked, "Do you have Yahoo! Messenger?" I responded with, "Yes." He responded to me with, "Great! It'd be easier to talk to you that way since you can only give automated responses. So find me by searching for _____ (insert screename here)." I logged into my Messenger account and found him right away.

We "talked", sent pics and just got to know each other really well. Then, being stupid but feeling brave, I gave him my phone number. We spent the next 6 HOURS on the phone just talking...like we were old friends trying to catch up on something we have been missing all of our lives. After 6 hours, it was getting kind of late and I really wanted to go to karaoke (my all-time FAVORITE pastime)

and I told him this and that I would really like to talk to him tomorrow. He said, "Hold on! Don't leave yet! Let me put my kids to bed and I'll call you back in 15 minutes." I did my own thing and got ready to leave and in EXACTLY 15 minutes, he called me back. He said, "I know this sounds crazy, but I'd really like to meet you! Can I get your address and I will take you to karaoke." And, of course, my dumb but brave self gave him the address. It took him almost 45 minutes to get to me from where he was living. But I wasn't just going to get in a truck with some guy I had just met and go with him to wherever he wanted to go so I took him to a place where I knew EVERYONE!

We hung out, drank, I sang, he listened, we got to know each other even better. I didn't get home until almost 4 o'clock in the morning because I was having such a good time with this guy. As he was getting ready to leave he told me he wanted to see me again. That was Tuesday, November 27, 2007. On Wednesday, after he had only gotten 2 hours of sleep from the night before and then having to go to work all day, he came and picked me up and we walked to pick my kids up from school and then he invited me to a hockey game. I took my kids to his house, met his kids, and left my kids to be babysat by his oldest daughter (who was almost 13). Had a great time at the hockey game, ran into some old friends I hadn't seen in over a year, and just got to know him better. I thought to myself, "Maybe it's just me...but I think I am falling in love with this guy after only 1 DAY of knowing him..." We picked up my kids when the game was over and he brought us all home.

On Thursday, he came back to my house, walked with me to pick up my kids and then hung out with me on my mom's front porch. It was getting to be around dinner time and he told me he had to go. Then he said, "I have to fly to Las Vegas for the weekend because I am taking my softball team to a tournament. I will be leaving really early in the morning but I will call you when I land and I will see you when I get home." I don't know what came over me, I started CRYING! I told him that I didn't want him to go, I thought he would go out looking for someone a little older with more experience being a mom than I was, I was just heartbroken that he waited until the last second to tell me...I know, I'm a freak in that sense...but like I said, I thought I was falling in love with him. He assured me that was not why he was going to Vegas, they had this trip planned for months, and he couldn't back out now because he was a team member and a coach. So after I calmed down, he drove away. As he did, I cried again. But he called me...2 minutes after he left my house. He said, "I don't do this very often, I have just been playing the field. But something inside me doesn't want to leave you...I think I am falling in love with you." My breath caught and I said, "I think I am falling in love with you, too. Please hurry home so we can find out."

Friday, November 30, 2007: He called me the second his plane landed and every second he had free after that. At about 9 o'clock at night he said, "If I could fly you out here, would you come spend the rest of the weekend with me? I miss you already." I told him I couldn't because I didn't have anyone to watch my daughters for an entire weekend. He told me to give him some time and he would figure something out...That kind of made me nervous. But I trusted him and I waited. After about 30 minutes, he called me back and said, "I talked to my sister and she said her and her daughters would watch your girls if you wanted to come out here. This is her address..." The next morning (which happened to be his 36th birthday), I was in a cab to drop my kids off at some lady's house whom I had never met before. Her daughter answered the door, I said goodbye to my kids, and I walked away. I had a huge feeling of guilt for doing this to my children, but I didn't want to miss an opportunity to see the possible soulmate I had been looking for my whole life and I flew to Vegas to be with him.

When I got home on Monday, I went to his sister's house to pick up my kids and finally meet her (she was great! and the kids were safe). He got home on Tuesday and we picked up right where we left off. For about 2 weeks we carried on like this. I saw him every day or we spent the weekends with him and his kids. On December 12, 2007, the power went out in my mom's house and we were freezing and I was talking to him on the phone. He said, "I don't want you guys freezing all night so I am coming to get you." We spent the next 3 days looking for somewhere to move in together while we stayed at his house. We found what we were looking for on December 15, 2007 and have been living together ever since.

Now, I don't personally suggest that's how every person should get to know the person you want to be with. But for me, it worked. And almost 6 glorious years later, almost 3 years of which we have been married,

I have gotten 3 stepchildren (a daughter who joined the military,



a daughter who just graduated from high school,


and a son who is in the process of figuring out what he wants in life),



I have kept my 2 daughters (one who is headed to 9th grade


and one who is headed to 6th),


I got my son (who is almost 2),


AND I am pregnant with my last child (A DAUGHTER!).


Not everything has been perfect, but the way we met was and continues to keep me in awe every day of my life.

Have you ever done anything that crazy? How did you meet the person you are with?

***NOTE: Not all pictures are in order of year or happening...but they are my family***